Eclectic Entrepreneur
So, I’m still coasting in the forty club. A divorced, single mom of two crazy, fun daughters.
And I’m discovering that I like dating with no strings attached.
Which is interesting. I’ve always wanted a grandiose kind of love. But now, I’m content just dating, having fun and going home. There’s no pressure for anything.
I’m either on my way to being emotionally unavailable.
How do you feel about dating with no strings attached?
The first few years of my forties has been an emotional war with a blood covered battlefield. It has been one knock down drag out fight after another. To say it’s been rough is an understatement.
However, I’m still around.
One thing I thought, was that I’d be established relationship wise. I had imagined that by my forties I would be coasting in that area. Traveling with my love. Exploring each other and new things. Just having fun honestly. But what I am learning is, I live vicariously through others very well. And that I am adapting to a new idea of who I am. I’m not sure if I like it yet though. We shall see.
What did you think you would be or have by the time you got to the forty club? And has it happened?
Love not lies! I want the OTHER four letter word!
There had to be punishment.
One could not simply do what you did and go unscathed. No. There had to be retribution. And I’m here for it. Despite what has been said, revenge is definitely best served warm with tea. Maybe even a hearty meal.
But it must be served. In a manner so subtly perfect, that you won’t even realize it is being served at all. You’ll just feel the discomfort without knowing why. It will make you torn from within. Distraught and anguished.
I can’t wait to get started.
After everything, this is where I ended up? A shell? A weaker version of my greatness? A teary eyed doe in the headlights of a truck that will not stop?
For what?
A touch? A left over smile that wasn’t meant for me to begin with? Crumbs?
Am I no better than crumbs? Than lies so easily whispered in the throws of passion? Than the consolation prize?
I see. And you will see too. But when you do, you will have no idea what you’re looking at. And then you will be me.
I should have just eaten the cake…
My heart was only as safe as the hands I allowed to hold it.
In hindsight, you showed me how unsafe you were. I just chose to see otherwise.
Before you, time didn’t exist. Now, every day I remember the clock is ticking.
My, how things have changed…
When everything you are becomes everything that complicates the relationship, change is inevitable…
Or forfeit your right to love.
Did I cry tears of gold? Or hide behind sheets of stars? When you swam through my oceans of pain, how were you able to see me?
I feel your presence, your strength, enter me. Your soul covers me.
You see me, my love.
Ebony Mystique 